A few times in the past week or so, I've had someone use the phrase "To tell the truth..." or, "Honestly..." to begin a statement, usually one in which they're communicating some personal feeling or opinion about a subject they perceive to be "touchy." In most cases I think they mean it in the sense of "I'm going to be more candid or blunt with you right now than I might otherwise be," as opposed to "I've been lying to you about some or all of what I've already said, and now I'm going to tell the truth for a moment." But the phrases and the way they strike me serve as a reminder that honesty in word and deed is something I very much take for granted these days. I don't think it's a matter of being naive - I'm cautious enough and a good enough "judge of character" that I can usually tell when I'm being conned by someone who is being intentionally dishonest. What's harder to discern and deal with are the people who don't even value honesty enough to see dishonesty as a negative or harmful act - the folks who are lying to themselves as easily as they lie to others. But of course, that kind of deep personal honesty - in which we're always truthful with ourselves and others about an emotion, desire, observation, mistake, or other situation - is the hardest to practice. But, to be honest, I think it's also the most rewarding.
Tag: communication
One of the things that is difficult for me to deal with in the world of blogging and even just editorial/public writing in general is that for any given issue, it often feels like every possible perspective has been rendered by others in so many different ways well before *I* get to that issue. This has gotten "worse" with the advent of blogging, where those viewpoints are often published within minutes or hours of any given piece of information becoming available. So by the time I develop an opinion about something, I'm often left with the sense that it would be a waste of my time to say roughly the same things that have already been said, with only a minor degree of personalized presentation.
Continue reading "When it's all already been said"
I've been doing more and more public speaking over the last few years, and find that it's something I enjoy immensely. There was a time when I was younger when I considered a "career" in it (as a minister, even), despite my introverted nature and the nervous shakes I'd always get right before beginning a talk. I'm still introverted and I still get the shakes once in a while, but I really appreciate opportunities to be a part of group learning and educational sessions, especially when I have something valuable to contribute and/or unique ways of contributing it. Lately I've been getting some good feedback on my approach to these opportunities and my ability to engage an audience; I've also found more and more sessions that fit well with other projects I'm pursuing. So, I've created a page on this site about speaking opportunities and requests, in hopes that it will lead to more of these. If you're involved with a group or event that might benefit from this kind of contribution, please let me know!
I get the sense that I tend to spend an unusual amount of time exercising my "right" as a consumer to provide feedback to the companies and organizations from which I buy products and services. The general trend in "consumer action" these days when a company is providing poor customer service or substandard products seems to be cursing a bit under one's breath, perhaps having a tense exchange with The Manager, but otherwise letting it go...and usually returning again soon to patronize the same business without a memory of frustrating experiences of the past. Whatever the reason might be for this trend - reduction of our shopping choices, general consumer apathy, or something else - it's exactly what many businesses are counting on from all of us so they can keep their bottom line where they like it. I have a different sense about how we should act in the face of poor service and products.
Continue reading "The Customer Can Always Write"
I'm always amazed at what people assume you will automatically know or do when they send you a vague e-mail message with a vague request. At Summersault, we get messages sent to a generic "webmaster" address on a regular basis where people say "This website isn't working" or "I have a question about this website" and that's it. Of course, we host hundreds of websites, so it's kind of hard to figure out what they're talking about. Just today, someone posted a time-sensitive billing request for their local cable company on my web page about local ISPs that happens to mention said company. Sure, ma'am, I'll just update their billing records for you the next time I'm logged in to their system. I'm sure she'll be more confused when her service is shut off and she claims "but I sent you a message through some guy's website!".
Today I had a speaking engagement on combating unsolicited junkmail (spam). It was one of my first opportunities to speak about this topic to a public audience, and I was glad for the chance to share all of the knowledge I've accumulated about what is increasingly the bane of the Internet. A lot of people seem to be content to hit the delete key as they sort through their e-mail, but I think many are realizing that this approach doesn't "scale" well -- insert here numerous statistics about how much it costs and will cost in lost productivity, abused resources, deaths of baby seals, etc. The participants in my seminar were thirsty for details about the phenomenon and how to make it go away. I think the complexity of the issue can be surprising to some, so end-user education is one of the best things one can do to address the problem.
Any way you look at it, spam sucks, and it's not going away. As it becomes more of a problem, folks will look for better solutions, and I'm glad that I'm involved in that effort.